YO i'm in a dunno-what mood now..
Let's begin my crap..
I still remember the day we stepped up and started doing our jobs, it was something like 20th July 2007, 3 days before my birthday. To me it almost seemed like a very special birthday present. I got on my job eagerly, although i was still totally not sure what to do!
Then it went on and on. Worries, tears, frustration came to me. I tried not to accept them, but no i can't, so i told myself to bear with it and i always had to self-consolate myself. That time.. it was always a sense of helplessness and sian-ness that came at me.. seriously, I became quite bored, because I've seen the difficulties of my job. I tried to ask myself where the problem lies..
Well, if you don't mind me admitting..
- It was the rowdy group of sec4s- they used to interupt me and disturb me.. they made sure that I won't feel good in the job
- It was, very sadly, also some juniors who didn't behave too well and they added quite a lot of trouble. My burden was quite heavy because of that.
What else... problems with the teachers ( whichever teacher, cos all got some problems...haha)!
There was alot of mis-communication problems between teachers-in-charge and instructors, and it left me confused. What I had to do was to find out everything myself.. then.. somehow in my opinion I realised that the instructors were not as serious and focused as before.. it made me worried, because afterall what affects an orchestra's reputation most is the kind of music they produce..
I was so worried that the whole orchestra's standard would drop like crazy, and it would be especially sickening if it is during my period of control.. it would be saddening to see that..
That time.. there were few that i could really trust.. I was only comfortable with my dear SLs, Gladys and teachers-in-charge. Thanks alot, really.. These are the people who were supportive, responsible and had with them quite alot of aspirations for BPCO. Without them... my job would be much more difficult.. thank thank thank thank thank you you you you you.....
( 5 thank you . ! )
* This is becoming more like a reflection leh.. how.. haha*
okay.. i'm not going to write more... because i'm tired and need to rest. Can I continue another day? haha=)
{the riddle of red}
